No *Aman for Aman

*Aman = safety or peace in Hindi

As if the constant pressure of studies & peer pressure were not enough, students (some fledgling like) now have to deal with the ragging menace as well. While browsing through a couple of sites that covered the recent news of the death of Aman (a young medical student) due to ragging, I came across some interesting misconceptions.

The Human rights website claims that "Ragging" is a "Western Concept". I vehemently disagree.

If by Eastern you mean India, then please go back to the epic stories of Ramayan and Mahabharat. Didn't the Kauravs rag the Pandavs? Weren't Luv and Kush ragged in Valmiki's ashram? The Mongols were most definitely never a peace loving race either.

Ragging is an age old concept. It is not a brain child of the west but as old as human nature. I cannot lay blame where it is not due, nor unjustly absolve the guilty. There is no harm in accepting our failures.

As children or even grown-ups don't siblings rag each other? We choose to call it 'leg-pulling'. How altruistic!

So how does one define ragging? If I am a couch potato and some friends force me to go out with them, I call it ragging. If my brother pushes me around to get his work done, I call it ragging. If my seniors in college ask me to address them as 'Sir' or 'Mam', I call it ragging.

"Any activity done by and to an individual per force by others (known or unknown) that lacks their express will or wish is ragging."

There is nothing healthy about it. No ragging activity can ever be called friendly. Any one who does not agree, should be flogged in public. Lets see if they come back and say, 'Thank you FRIEND for flogging me. let's have lunch together tomorrow.'

As a senior, if I want to make friends with my juniors, nothing stops me from holding my hand out and saying a simple, 'Hi, My name is Maitreyee. What's yours?'
If my junior gives a friendly response....I have a new friend...If not...I do not want such a friend! Why can't youngsters understand this simple logic? How can they presume to understand another human being by scaring or bulling them. How can you possibly expect their friendship?

Ragging in under-graduate colleges is not a new concept. What is surprising, is the lack of action around it. The anti-ragging bill has been pending since forever. Why?

I keep close contacts will young students to understand their ideals and motivations. I love their uninterrupted, sometime under-developed but always refreshing take on life.

In the convent I went to, we never encountered ragging. I recall on our first day, some 20 odd seniors got into a class of 120 juniors, closed the doors and went around asking for introductions. It perhaps took them an hour to finish all the introductions. In the end, neither party remembered much yet, we were welcomed into our sorority and that was that.

We were the freshers. The seniors worked hard to arrange our 'Freshers Party'. We were screened, groomed, & assisted to handle the pressure of a 'Miss Fresher' contest. We got sneak previews of the hep dance numbers being performed. We watched out for the exciting theater performances planned by the arts group. We had fun helping them plan our fresher party.

WE NEVER DID NOR WERE EVER ASKED TO SHELL OUT A SINGLE PENNY FOR OUR OWN FRESHER PARTY!

The actual party a month later, was an absolute blast! If you haven't been to a 'Girls Convent' "Freshers Party", you have no idea what you have missed. I never knew girls could scream and whistle so loud. Never thought girl rogues were possible :-P Hell, I never realized, I could scream so loud myself!!! If you thought contest questions on TV are tough, check out the questions we were asked. The food was not 'five star', but who cared. We were figure conscious 18 somethings & dressed in our finery on top of that. Food was most definitely not a priority. Even so, the burgers, cakes, chips and soft drinks, tasted amazing. Its was a different life. I wish I could show kids these days, what they have missed.

We still did not know all the names of our seniors. But one thing we did know, was that we wouldn't hesitate to arrange a grand 'Farewell Party' for them. That was true comradeship...without expectations.

- Today I hear, the juniors are asked to provide seniors mobile recharge coupons.
- They are forced to share lunch.
- They are not allowed to carry mobile phones.
- Even the canteen is deemed out of limits for the juniors!!! So what does a junior do when a senior has finished their lunch?

Are we still dealing with kids here? How can a human being (barely an adult at that), live with such a conscience? And these are called harmless ragging activities.

If all kids go through the same torture in their first years, how does their conscience permit them to inflict the same on their successors? How do they expect to cultivate an individuality when they perpetually follow the crowd?

- What trust can I invest in an 18-19 year old boy, who asks his junior girls, questions like "Which of the guys here would you like to sleep with?", during a Miss Fresher contest?
- What character can I attribute an 18-19 year old girl who asks from a junior boy 'tricks to kiss a girl on the lips on a first date'!

Such immaturity, narrow-mindedness, desperation and frustration is shocking. Can we do something about it? Is there a solution? Do these kids have an answer? The teachers definitely have none.

I did hear some of my contemporaries in engineering colleges suffered such ragging. They have barely any fun recollections of their freshers day. I feel sorry for them.

There are always anti-social elements in colleges. They are however, always the minority. So what is the majority doing? How is it that the youth, that talks of failure of their elders, society, POLITICIANS etc, has not been able to uproot its own demonic tendencies? And they are the future. Are you sure you want to share that future?